Snowed In

7.4.2016

I made an ill-advised call to a pal the other night after several beers.  My pal was still up and was in a jovial mood.  We cracked a bunch of jokes and made each other howl.

The next morning I remembered the conversation, but didn't remember anything of what we talked about.  I rang my pal and asked her if she remembered what we talked about.  She said she remembered laughing her head off, but not about what was so funny.

Then I realized something:  Since we are all under surveillance and there are departments of the government that listen to and record our cell conversations, then someone in the government heard us and recorded our conversation!  We're saved!

So yesterday I filed a Freedom of Information request to get a transcript of that late-night hilarious phone conversation.  I'll post it here when it comes in!

Tonight - The Homestead   (but you already knew that... and so did the Feds)

bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!

Women and Children First

7.3.2016


There are warning signs on the trash and recycling bins we get in LA stating, "Private property.  Scavenging and removing items from this container is forbidden by law.  Violators may be prosecuted."  And if you're thinking this discourages the legion of dumpster divers that harvest their livelihoods from them, you are mistaken.

A recent news story made me think about how diving is outlawed:  Police found a body in a dumpster in North Hollywood.  I'm guessing that the police didn't actually FIND the body because they weren't opening up dumpsters to look for contraband or illegal immigrants or dead bodies while on routine patrol.  I imagine the garbage man didn't find the body either.  I figure the garbage man sits in the cab of his garbage truck and maneuvers it into position and snags it with his forks or claw.  He didn't find the body.  The dumpster diver - opening dumpster lids, looking for cans or bottles or whatever they deem "loot" - found the body.

So why is dumpster diving prohibited by law?  They clearly serve a purpose in law enforcement.  They detect and report dead bodies dumped in dumpsters.  The investigation's first step is finding a crime has been committed!

For this reason, I find it logical that dumpster divers should not be forbidden from this important community service.  We can't have dumped bodies going unnoticed!  No, I think instead of being sanctioned, I think they should be deputized.

Tonight - Dovre Club   (get your Irish on!!!) 

**CASH ONLY** 


bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!

Hyphen Central (REDUX)

7.2.2016 (first posted this week 2002)

Hello peas and carrots! It's your pal Old Captain Walnut here. I wonder how you all are doing these days, as I haven't seen many of you for weeks! Good, bad? Happy, sad?

How are those habits going? Those compulsio s? Those hard-to-wrangle emotional states? Isolated? Together?
So many questio s.

Let's have the groop play space-age bachelor-pad catch-up tonight. I've got an idea where:


Tonight - House of Shields

Mix up them puzzle pieces, we'll sort 'em as a groop, a family if you will, then put 'em together again.



bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!

Lenny (REDUX)

7.1.2016 (first posted this day 2003)


Your mama called and mama said to go to your room. Good thing your room is The Orbit Room.

Who's going to their room? I am!

See you there!

bye-ee!



whrr ... clik!