The Grey Box

1.1.2k1

A while back I wrote a TNSC Venue Announcement that had a bit to do with my gumball machine. In case you don't remember, I've got this official-like glass and metal gumball machine that's now about half-full, but was somewhere around three-quarters when I wrote that other one. Back then I used to warn people who were throwing in pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters or even Canadian coins that some of them gumballs were likely stale. You ever come across a stale gumball? Looks normal. No mold. No faded color. No funny smell. The dang thing looks absolutely normal but you pop one in and bite – CRACK! – there goes a molar. It's not unlike biting a rock. Not that it hurts, but there's this gunshot in you mouth and you're soon countin' teeth. Right. Now I figure there's a lot more stale gumballs. More than there was back then. And they're getting staler. Getting to be more of a liability. I suppose I should empty the thing and get me some fresh gumballs. You know what I mean. If I'm going to provide a service, I'd ought to do so responsibly. Ain't a great idea to bust up everyone's smiles. People want fresh gum, give 'em fresh gum. Hard to beat fresh gum. These suckers blow really big bubbles, too. Remember learning how to blow bubbles? Who taught you? A kid who lived down the street, Surgery Boy,* taught me. I learned how to blow bubble gum bubbles and, for the record, spit bubbles at exactly the same time. That's because the gum would give you this – excuse me - sugary, syrupy spit that was perfect for blowing spit bubbles. To this day, some fifty years later, I still blow the best spit bubbles after chewing bubble gum. Ha ha!



330 Ritch Street (Guess where it's at?)
330 Ritch St.
SF, CA 94107
(415) 541-9574



This joint is really close to the CalTrans train station. Who's glad the Holidays are over? I sure am. New to the list: Berceste. Is she back from the 50th state yet?

TONIGHT'S CONTEST: Pronounce "Berceste."

TONIGHT'S DRAMATIC REENACTMENT: The debut of the "euro." On this day in 1999 Europe is united with a common currency for the first time since Charlemagne's reign in the ninth century. Eleven European Union nations launched the currency hoping to increase European integration and stimulate economic growth. Hard euro currency will debut 01 January 2002, replacing individual nations' hard currency. Players: Uriah plays the euro; replacing the mark, markka, franc, lira, peseta and escudo are Scott, Kay, Brett, Mel, Lee and Kristin. David plays the Austrian schilling and Woody plays the florin and Irish pound. Good luck, friends.

TONIGHT'S SINGLED OUT LIST MEMBER(S): Anybody with Bali Belly.

My dear sweet Auntie sent me a variety Holiday gift pack from the Hickory Farms people for Christmas. Them folks screwed the order up and I got it for New Year's and ... and I got a case of 'em! 12 Holiday gift variety packs! My point: Who wants cheese balls and who wants beef sticks?

Go to the bar. You need it after all you've been through. Thank you thank you thank you for being patient. It's paid off, no? Bring your pals. I know I will. See you there. bye-ee!