Bad Math

5.1.2k2


I’ve regressed in a fairly important skill. I don’t remember the regression’s catalyst, or its duration to now, but I know now that it’s real: I got me a real problem with shoelaces.

It must have been kindergarten, or maybe even earlier, that my peers and I were forced, cajoled and ridiculed into learning how to tie shoelaces. I remember there was a little song or poem or rhyme about a rabbit running around a doghouse and ducking into a sewerpipe: Symbolic of the loops and knots and such. I remember there were two twin girls that could tie each other’s shoes but not their own. I didn’t have any trouble tying shoes. Didn’t need a corny rhyme or anything. It was a simple, repeatable process and it was within my young person’s capacity. That don’t explain why I’ve developed such a problem lately.
My problem lies in the untying part of the process. Tying is fine and has been but I make a mess out of untying. I end up tying the laces into little itty-bitty knots. Tight knots. Often, I’m balancing on one leg while trying to untie. I might get one shoe off clean, but the other I grab the wrong end that’s found its way through a loop, pull and render a knot. Then I lose balance and fall on head.
It doesn’t help that I routinely change my shoes at least three times a day: On with the bike shoes, off with the bike shoes. On with the regular shoes, off. On with the bike shoes again, off. Regular, off. I will turf one of the untyings fairly bad, but I will royally screw another one and end up falling over.
Two things going for me: The geeks at University of Bisbee just published Shoe Lace Untying Made Easy. Talk about timing! The other thing: My slippers are slip on!


Tonight: Wish

News: Wish is the new bar that’s taken residence in the carcass of (the) El Bobo. Some folks have been there and say it’s all right. Happy Birthday Bishop.

Tonight’s Singled-Out List Member: Tama

Come and see your pals and curse the No-Kitchen-Fancy-El Bobo. See you there! bye-ee!