Johnson.
7.4.2k4  
 
Ya like skippin' rocks across water?  Me?  I love it.  I enjoy the ritual of carefully choosing the right rock:  Smooth and flat, but with enough weight to put some elbow into.  Sometimes, for kicks, I grab a completely unworthy rock and huck it.  Them round, boxy rocks will indeed skip a couple times, given the proper angle and enough speed.
 
I often find myself feeling a bit sorry for those rocks I hurl into the deep.  I ask myself, "How long did it take that poor iddle-little rock to get up here on the riverbank or beach or lakeside or whate'r ... only to get flung back into the depths from whence it came oh-so-long ago?"  When I find myself feeling for the rocks I feel nothing but disgust for myself.  What a dope!
 
So after 30+ years of skippin' rocks, I paid 'em all back by getting myself skipped across a semi-placid lake, not unlike a skippin' stone.  Went up campin', ya see, and one of the campers had a skiboat with a big 'ol motor and a rope with which to drag a big 'ol innertube behind it.  The innertube had canvas handles and was real slick - it was built for the purpose of being dragged behind a skiboat.  Well I got in and the boat captain took off and GODDAMN is it fun to be dragged really fuckin' fast behind a boat.  In, on, and out of the wake is cool, but my favorite is when the 'tube and its passenger is flung way out beyond the wake.  I tried to get my face close-close-close to the surface of the water, and when I did I immediately felt what it must feel like to be a rock some fuckhead just skipped across the water.  Then, as usual, I thought I was pretty goddamn dorky for feeling like a rock and suddenly I hit a big (big being a relative word) BIG lake ripple and I got thrown the fuck out of the 'tube and right into the lake.  Complete with a facefull of lake water. 

Tonight - Kickin' it North Beach w/ Jesus: Grant and Green.
 
Here's tonight's: Find the Reference!

Now ya might be thinkin', "Why North Beach w/ NO parking and Why G&G?"  Well I'll tell ya:  Founding Member John Metsker suggested the joint because his pal and boss, the immortal bartender Vise Grip, has a wifey that's croonin' at said bar tonight.  Do yrself a favor and Go And See.  I know I will.
 
See you there!
bye-ee!

whrr ... clik!