Hugh Grant
9.3.2k6

Most of you know that I moved to LA. Some of you know that I got a job a few months back in Hollywood. When I started the job, I stomped around the neighborhood during lunch and after work, exploring the weird place that is Highland Bd between Santa Monica Bd and Hollywood Bd.

None of you know what I found there: I found a new Worldview. I met some nice people and they talked to me and they made sense of this crazy world and my empty life and they help me get by and I get to say thank you by handing over my paycheck, and I'll tell you it's a bargain: My job don't pay for shit.

Anyway, one of the tenets of the Worldview is to purge oneself of secrets. I ain't got but one thing that I keep secret, so I'll fulfill my duty to the Worldview and spill. Here goes.

When I was a child I had three buttocks. The third was somewhat discrete in that it didn't really draw attention like a third arm or something, but it was not totally transparent. It forced me to walk with a hitch in an otherwise normal gait. What's more is that in the crack of the extra cheek there was a pseudo-anus that puckered when I would defecate, but otherwise was inert as it was not connected to my intestine. The third ass didn't really bother me and was actually a boon when I played little-league contact sports like ice hockey and football as I didn't need to pad that side of my ass. Sadly, though, my third ass was shot off by a Mex high on gold paint and mescal at a desert kegger in high school. The surgeon was a master with the scar and due to my incessant begging he relented and left the pseudo-anus and I thank the stars he did because it's a source of extreme erotic pleasure when my lover pinches, tongues and fondles it during sex. If she refuses, I throw her out of the car and drive off.

I love you all very much.

Tonight - Lucky 13.

Here's tonight's: Find the Reference!


bye-ee!

whrr ... clik!