Flo

12.4.2kXI

Being an American, I made pancakes and fried up bacon for my family on Sunday morning. Preparing for a flip, instead I was distracted by a crash out on the street beyond the kitchen window, followed instantaneously by somethin' flyin' by at a VERY low altitude. I first thought one of those little go-karts had wrecked at high speed and whizzed by. Nope.

Nope, it was some butthole that was speedin' through the neighborhood and hit the treacherous dip out front and lost control for long enough to clip my little wife's car. What I saw flyin' was the butthole's side mirror that she sheared off on my little wife's side mirror. Both were beyond help; the butthole's broke and hurt by the impact and the near 50' it flew through the air before it hit the pavement.

Anyhoo, the LAPD rolled out and wrote up a traffic collision report. The officer also told me that they'd caught the butthole, and that the butthole was drunk AND a girl. Swell.

So I called the LAPD the next day and they gave me the deets on the drunk grrrrl, which I plugged into the WWW. Turns out, the drunk grrrrrl is a waitress at a vegan restaurant.

Perhaps I'm misguided on the whole vegan thing, but I though it wasn't just a food choice but an whole lifestyle. The Vegan lifestyle. Hemp clothes, few showers, a high-n-mighty attitude. That kinda thing. Excluded, in my estimation, would be boozin'-up before noon on a Sunday, speeding through residential neighborhoods and hitting-and-running. Am I naive?

Good thing the stupid bitch had insurance. She will be paying for her stupid shit.

Tonight - Homestead.

Merry Christmas David Geffin. Happy Hanukkah, everybody. Peace out!

bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!