Friendly reminder that there is NO THURSDAY NIGHT SOCIAL CLUB MEETING scheduled for this evening.
See you all in 2014!!
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Thursday, December 26, 2013
R O B O T H O L I D A Y !!!
12.4.2013
Friendly reminder that there is NO THURSDAY NIGHT SOCIAL CLUB MEETING scheduled for this evening.
See you all in 2014!!
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Friendly reminder that there is NO THURSDAY NIGHT SOCIAL CLUB MEETING scheduled for this evening.
See you all in 2014!!
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Thursday, December 19, 2013
Chef!!
12.3.2013
It was more than 10 years ago. Jerry and I were heading to the City Club to pick up the meat for the BBQ. We took the elevator up, walked the stairs past the mural and entered the kitchen. The meat mountain was waiting for us.
Chef peeked around the corner. "You guys want something LIVE?"
I immediately thought, "goat."
(Jerry later told me he immediatly thought, "goat.")
"Uh ..." I said.
"C'mere!" Chef said and led us into the big 'ol fridge. He turned and took something off a low shelf. He turned ...
Two big squirming lobsters were the LIVE things he was talking about.
"Sure! But how about just one?"
"You pussy!" Chef said.
He was right. We ended up boring that lobster to death.
Tonight - the final "official" meeting of the 2013 calendar year. C'mon out and wish honorary founding member Mathias Genser a happy birthday.
See you at The Homestead
Happy Holidays to all and see you in the new year!!
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
It was more than 10 years ago. Jerry and I were heading to the City Club to pick up the meat for the BBQ. We took the elevator up, walked the stairs past the mural and entered the kitchen. The meat mountain was waiting for us.
Chef peeked around the corner. "You guys want something LIVE?"
I immediately thought, "goat."
(Jerry later told me he immediatly thought, "goat.")
"Uh ..." I said.
"C'mere!" Chef said and led us into the big 'ol fridge. He turned and took something off a low shelf. He turned ...
Two big squirming lobsters were the LIVE things he was talking about.
"Sure! But how about just one?"
"You pussy!" Chef said.
He was right. We ended up boring that lobster to death.
Tonight - the final "official" meeting of the 2013 calendar year. C'mon out and wish honorary founding member Mathias Genser a happy birthday.
See you at The Homestead
Happy Holidays to all and see you in the new year!!
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Thursday, December 12, 2013
Fe (REDUX)
12.2.2013
I've been honored and humbled by the award I've received from some very close friends and notable professionals: "Best Shirt-Ironer (Non-professional), 700 block Taylor Street, SF." Winning caught me by surprise, really, as I didn't have a thought of winning the thing at all. Founding Member Alan J. Chimenti nominated me as a joke, or so I thought. "No, man, I've noticed the crispness of your collar and your paper-smooth sleeves for some time. And to think you don't use any starch at all! My goodness!" Alan blows smoke up my ass all the time, so his news of his nomination of me didn't rile me. "Uh huh," I said, "that sounds great. I'll share my prize with you." I didn't know there was a prize. Alan gets one of the cufflinks (iron-shaped sterling-plated pure pig-iron (the prize-determination committee was not without a keen sense of irony, it seems!)). We'll roll up the other sleeve.
Then the reporter the Chronicle sends over is a bulldog! I thought I'd answered all the relevant questions in the first five minutes, but this person had other ideas. She wouldn't take "no more questions," or "no comment," or "I'm forbidden to speak about that," or "remember the gag order," for an answer. Whatever. Stay tuned to the Chronicle for the write-up.
Tonight - Dovre Club (Get your Irish on!!)
C'mon out and wish Mathias an (almost) Happy BDay.
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
I've been honored and humbled by the award I've received from some very close friends and notable professionals: "Best Shirt-Ironer (Non-professional), 700 block Taylor Street, SF." Winning caught me by surprise, really, as I didn't have a thought of winning the thing at all. Founding Member Alan J. Chimenti nominated me as a joke, or so I thought. "No, man, I've noticed the crispness of your collar and your paper-smooth sleeves for some time. And to think you don't use any starch at all! My goodness!" Alan blows smoke up my ass all the time, so his news of his nomination of me didn't rile me. "Uh huh," I said, "that sounds great. I'll share my prize with you." I didn't know there was a prize. Alan gets one of the cufflinks (iron-shaped sterling-plated pure pig-iron (the prize-determination committee was not without a keen sense of irony, it seems!)). We'll roll up the other sleeve.
Then the reporter the Chronicle sends over is a bulldog! I thought I'd answered all the relevant questions in the first five minutes, but this person had other ideas. She wouldn't take "no more questions," or "no comment," or "I'm forbidden to speak about that," or "remember the gag order," for an answer. Whatever. Stay tuned to the Chronicle for the write-up.
Tonight - Dovre Club (Get your Irish on!!)
C'mon out and wish Mathias an (almost) Happy BDay.
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Thursday, December 05, 2013
Deluxe Funnel! (REDUX)
12.1.2013
Well I quit my job. I had it up to here with the jerks at the plant, the tasteless lunches, the fatty snacks, the lousy (read: NO) coffee situation, the soul-sucking commute, the dangerous walk, the rickety bridge, the viscious dogs, the rabid beaver-squirells, the agressive panhandlers, the corrupt cops, the way-too-friendly street whores, the sub-average watering holes, the human, dog, and pidgey-widgey poop, the stiff toll, the "going-up-again" bus and train fares, the broken bike racks, the terrible wind, the ever-present clouds, the frozen mini-KitKats™ (which I like, mind you) and the stultifying conversations. I heard about a sexy new career on the radio, called the number it listed and showed up that day for my interview. I was hired on the spot! Hot damn that does a lot for a guy when he's havin' "One Of Those Days." I got a clothing stipend from my new boss (a sexy, silver-haired, 70-something granny), hauled ass to the Oakland Uniform Supply on Broadway, scored a sweet deal on what's known in the industry as "Car Salesman," WORE IT OUT OF THE STORE and hit the fuckin' bricks sporting my new gig: Reputation Consulting.
You read it right: Reputation Consulting. The multiple-choice test I took in my interview indicated that I was a natural, so I wasted NO time. My walk took me by my favorite "Donut & Things" and I ducked in and told Pebbles (his real name is Hsiung, but he makes everyone call him Pebbles (Why I do not know)) I told Pebbles he has the reputation of having the best goddamn donuts and things this side of MLK Drive and he said 'No shit Sherlock." I asked him if he would like to talk about it and he asked if I would have my usual dozen glazed and mebbe a couple 52" duck-brown replacement shoe strings or some replacement cheap-o plastic dominoes or some various waxen numeric birthday cake candles or some really crappy dish towels or some likely toxic crayons or a shitty hand-held pinball game, or a grab-bag of toy barnyard animals or a flawed German-made coloring book or a pinata buster (with blindfold) or a Dick Tracy-themed 2-pack party hat or a 4-piece fruit magnet set or a 32-piece Jesus sticker set, or a garden knee pad or a 10-pack sponge hair roller or a metallic car dashboard sun shade and I said no! I was here to consult with him about his reputation and not donuts and, well, things. He said his reputation for donuts was great and I agreed. He said his reputation for things was great and I agreed with that too and so I set my sights on another couple peeps I knew needed a little reputation consultation: Linkey-Loo Coordinator, Porn Title of the Week Coordinator and, you guessed it, Lee, Lee The Musical Bee. They did not return my phone calls.
Tonight - on this projected frigid evening, come on out and warm up w/ your pals at The Lone Palm.
See you there!!
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Well I quit my job. I had it up to here with the jerks at the plant, the tasteless lunches, the fatty snacks, the lousy (read: NO) coffee situation, the soul-sucking commute, the dangerous walk, the rickety bridge, the viscious dogs, the rabid beaver-squirells, the agressive panhandlers, the corrupt cops, the way-too-friendly street whores, the sub-average watering holes, the human, dog, and pidgey-widgey poop, the stiff toll, the "going-up-again" bus and train fares, the broken bike racks, the terrible wind, the ever-present clouds, the frozen mini-KitKats™ (which I like, mind you) and the stultifying conversations. I heard about a sexy new career on the radio, called the number it listed and showed up that day for my interview. I was hired on the spot! Hot damn that does a lot for a guy when he's havin' "One Of Those Days." I got a clothing stipend from my new boss (a sexy, silver-haired, 70-something granny), hauled ass to the Oakland Uniform Supply on Broadway, scored a sweet deal on what's known in the industry as "Car Salesman," WORE IT OUT OF THE STORE and hit the fuckin' bricks sporting my new gig: Reputation Consulting.
You read it right: Reputation Consulting. The multiple-choice test I took in my interview indicated that I was a natural, so I wasted NO time. My walk took me by my favorite "Donut & Things" and I ducked in and told Pebbles (his real name is Hsiung, but he makes everyone call him Pebbles (Why I do not know)) I told Pebbles he has the reputation of having the best goddamn donuts and things this side of MLK Drive and he said 'No shit Sherlock." I asked him if he would like to talk about it and he asked if I would have my usual dozen glazed and mebbe a couple 52" duck-brown replacement shoe strings or some replacement cheap-o plastic dominoes or some various waxen numeric birthday cake candles or some really crappy dish towels or some likely toxic crayons or a shitty hand-held pinball game, or a grab-bag of toy barnyard animals or a flawed German-made coloring book or a pinata buster (with blindfold) or a Dick Tracy-themed 2-pack party hat or a 4-piece fruit magnet set or a 32-piece Jesus sticker set, or a garden knee pad or a 10-pack sponge hair roller or a metallic car dashboard sun shade and I said no! I was here to consult with him about his reputation and not donuts and, well, things. He said his reputation for donuts was great and I agreed. He said his reputation for things was great and I agreed with that too and so I set my sights on another couple peeps I knew needed a little reputation consultation: Linkey-Loo Coordinator, Porn Title of the Week Coordinator and, you guessed it, Lee, Lee The Musical Bee. They did not return my phone calls.
Tonight - on this projected frigid evening, come on out and warm up w/ your pals at The Lone Palm.
See you there!!
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)