Gimme Gimme (REDUX)

5.3.2018  (first posted this week 2001)

These days I'm walkin' down the street and I hear someone call my name ... I don't even look. Used to be I'd hear my name or something that kinda sounded like my name, I'd look. Each and every time I looked, it wasn't anybody I knew. They weren't even saying my name. "DOG!" Same vowel sound as "Josh!" Cars, busses, people walkin' by, all honkin', screeching tires, blowing exhaust; yelling, crying, begging for change or smokes, all talkin' about something. Lotta background noise in the city. Someone yells "Dog!" and I hear "Josh!" Used to look and see who was calling my name. Don't anymore. Not that I'm sick of hearing phantom "Josh!," I just know that they ain't talking to me. I don't even care if they are talking to me. That happened recently too. Founding Member Alan Chimenti was across the street with his lovely wife. They had just stepped out of "Cats," or "Stomp," or "Dent" or some kind of goddamn waste of time like that and I happened to be on my way back home from hockey practice. "Josh!" they yell. I hear "Dog!" and keep on going down the street.

"Josh!" "Josh!"

"Dog!" "Dog!"

It takes Mrs. Alan Chimenti to break the spell: "Goddamn it! Josh you asshole! Look over here!" I looked, waved, crossed the street and let the Chimentis buy me a drink or two at the Owl Tree. I'm a firm believer in learned behavior and I learned how to respond to swearing a long, long time ago. Pop didn't really mean "Get over here!" unless he punctuated it with "Goddamn it!" I still respond to swearing but you better be smiling or willing to buy me a few drinks at the Owl Tree ... after you cuss me out.

Tonight: Wooden Nickel

News: Dee won last week's contest and I forgot her prize here at work. Der! Amy is new to the list. Speaking of the list, I'll keep it going for a while so you can subscribe to the Mailing List. I'll retire the manual list in a month or so. Oh! And I think I'm going to retire the Rant Section. Nobody rants. I know you have a lot to rant about. You just lazy?


TONIGHT'S DRAMATIC REENACTMENT: Jeremy is mostly recovered from the achey-breaky ass, so we'll postpone the DR another week. Jer wrote in: "Thanks to all List Members for the nice flowers and candy, and for your thoughtful cards. I'm touched that you took the time out of your busy schedules. (Shuba, I'm not one for fuzzy stuffed bunnys, but I sure appreciate it. The kids at the hospital like it a lot.) Alan, I really appreciated your visit. I didn't know you suffered the achey-breaky ass a year ago. I'm suprised that that restaurant is still in business, let alone that curry still being on the menu." We're glad you're on the road to recovery, Jer!

TONIGHT'S SINGLED-OUT LIST MEMBER: Loretta. Miss Loretta gets to go to Zietgiest next week, okay? Mark your calendars and meet her there. She will be answering questions and signing autographs. Bring a Sharpie.


bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!