2.1.2013
My pal from the ice rink's birthday is today. We connected because -aside from seeing each other every Thursday - we both like the Chicago Blackhawks.
Since the 'Hawks played the hometown goon squad "Kings" just this past Monday, I thought I'd see if any moderately-priced tickets were available. When I found out they were, I asked my pal's wife if she'd buy him one and I could surprise him with it in a rather sneaky way. She said, "Hell yes." I decided to surprise Ez, too.
So I got the tickets for him, Ez and me. And then my game was afoot! I lamented aloud to my pal that I looked for tickets and they were REALLY expensive. "Hey," I said, "what about you coming over to watch the game on my HDTV?" (He still has a fucking SDTV.) "I'll grill you some burgers and not get you a cake for your birthday. What do ya say?" He said okay. "Well come up with something you want to go with yr burger or you're going to get eggy-pickley tater salad to go with it. He said that sounded okay. So I had him hooked.
As the day of the game approached, I kept stirring the pot. I told him that Ez and I were gonna geek out and wear our Blackhawks jerseys to watch the game, so he had to wear his new jersey.
Lastly, I devised a plan to get him in the car and start heading toward the stadium. "Ah shit," I said, "I forgot the buns and I'm almost out of beer! We gotta go to the store!" I hid the tickets in the passenger seat's sun visor. When we were driving, I said, "See if my coupons are up there." He did and the tickets fell right into his lap. The jig was up!
The game was great, our team won and Ez high-fived everyone wearing Blackhawks gear he could. Often he'd just whack someone's hand. I told him he had to say, "good game," or "high-five!" to make his intention clear. He high-fived guys, girls, old women, drunk people, kids and even Staples Center workers. Everyone likes a little Blackhawks fan.
Tonight (the cozy confines of) - The Page
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Thursday, February 06, 2014
Thursday, January 30, 2014
The Firebug of the Bosporus
1.5.2014
I have had a framed picture of Gomez Addams similar to this image in my bathroom (and of course, now our bathroom) for years. Ez recently saw it and asked who he is. I found myself unable to answer the question in any way better than showing him the show, so I showed him.
I'm Father of the Year.
Tonight - The Homestead (of course)
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Penultimate (REDUX)
1.4.2014
Continued from 1.3.2k2
After a while, my friends and family began to notice my strange new habit. At first they chuckled at its novelty, but when they witnessed my frenzied shoe vacuuming, they stopped laughing.
I hadn’t realized that I was causing such a spectacle that day they found me out, but how could I explain my intra-barhop pit-stop at the Spiffy Auto Wash’s coin-fed car vac? We had just finished off the High Life at one dive and started the two-block trek to another oasis when the cat hair on my shoes lit that fire of obsession in my guts. It so happened that we were right in front of the car wash and I, forgetting myself, sprinted for the high-power vacuums, threw in quarters and luxuriated in the industrial suction. As I “came to,” I crossed the pavement to rejoin my friends and their looks told me volumes: “What the?” and “You’re a freak” and simply, “Dude.” “What,” I said, vainly attempting to deflect their contempt, “I had something on my shoe.” My brother, who scarcely holds anything back, said, “Something’s on your shoe, you scrape it off with a stick. You don’t foot-hump a car vacuum.” “I didn’t foot-hump a car vac,” I said, “there was cat hair on my shoes and I had to get it off.” He looked at me sideways and said, “Cat hair. You’ve got a problem, dude.”
My brother’s brutal honesty that night triggered a dormant no-bullshit-obsessions gene that had taken a back seat to my shoe-vacuuming obsession. I hadn’t realized it, but it had become slightly out of control. It was time to get on that road to recovery, and I knew just how to do it.
To be concluded.
Tonight - 500 Club - (a TNSC favorite for unknown reasons)
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Continued from 1.3.2k2
After a while, my friends and family began to notice my strange new habit. At first they chuckled at its novelty, but when they witnessed my frenzied shoe vacuuming, they stopped laughing.
I hadn’t realized that I was causing such a spectacle that day they found me out, but how could I explain my intra-barhop pit-stop at the Spiffy Auto Wash’s coin-fed car vac? We had just finished off the High Life at one dive and started the two-block trek to another oasis when the cat hair on my shoes lit that fire of obsession in my guts. It so happened that we were right in front of the car wash and I, forgetting myself, sprinted for the high-power vacuums, threw in quarters and luxuriated in the industrial suction. As I “came to,” I crossed the pavement to rejoin my friends and their looks told me volumes: “What the?” and “You’re a freak” and simply, “Dude.” “What,” I said, vainly attempting to deflect their contempt, “I had something on my shoe.” My brother, who scarcely holds anything back, said, “Something’s on your shoe, you scrape it off with a stick. You don’t foot-hump a car vacuum.” “I didn’t foot-hump a car vac,” I said, “there was cat hair on my shoes and I had to get it off.” He looked at me sideways and said, “Cat hair. You’ve got a problem, dude.”
My brother’s brutal honesty that night triggered a dormant no-bullshit-obsessions gene that had taken a back seat to my shoe-vacuuming obsession. I hadn’t realized it, but it had become slightly out of control. It was time to get on that road to recovery, and I knew just how to do it.
To be concluded.
Tonight - 500 Club - (a TNSC favorite for unknown reasons)
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Kelly's
1.3.2014
Hi!
Alan has been abducted by Yankee fans.
He has the only draft of tonight's venue announcement, so yr outta luck, since he's being held under wraps.
If we can secure his release, I'll post it.
Meanwhile:
Tonight - Lone Palm.
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
Hi!
Alan has been abducted by Yankee fans.
He has the only draft of tonight's venue announcement, so yr outta luck, since he's being held under wraps.
If we can secure his release, I'll post it.
Meanwhile:
Tonight - Lone Palm.
bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!
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