Nuke Gay Whales for Jesus
8.3.2k6

I want to make bumperstickers that say: "Know thy car's length and width and drive like a champion."

I drive the streets and freeways of LA every day now and aside from a handful of good drivers, these pilgrims are purebred shitty drivers. What makes a shitty driver? I had thought that driving too fast or too slow was the main problem. It is a big part of the problem, but increasingly I've observed that bad drivers are the ones who try to fit into a space too small; don't give the person they're squeezing in front of enough comfort room (and forcing one to apply the brakes (starting a chain-reaction of brakes)); or are too scared to try to fit into, through or around something because they don't fucking know the dimensions of their car. That's yr bad driver.

I actually had to get into Jailbreak (my Jeep) through the passenger door and crawl over the divider to get into the driver's seat because the dingus who had parked next to me gave me no room to open my door. I left a note: YOU LEAVE ME NO ROOM TO OPEN DOOR. YOU PARKD TOO CLOSE. PLEASE BE COOLER.

No lie. I hope they were peeved. Fuck 'em, I shoulda keyed their door.

Tonight - The Orbit Room.

Here's tonight's: Find the Reference!


bye-ee!

whrr ... clik!