Fixed It

3.5.2017

I forget why, but I was reminded of the flight we had back from Europe ten twelve years ago.

We were over the North Atlantic, chasing the setting sun and had been at it for hours.  Earlier, I had switched-on my handheld GPS and set a way point and named that way point "nowhere," as we were south of Greenland and I could see icebergs 36k feet below us.

The giant fireball eventually won the race and we were flying in the gloaming, then deep twilight, then, eventually, darkness.  We still had a long way to go, so I tried to get some Zs, and when that wasn't happening, I read for a while, since my wife was able to sleep.

A while later, my light fizzled and went out.  I flicked it a couple times and switched it on and off, but it was dead.  I tried to change the orientation of my cool sleeper seat (we were in biz class), but the controls were not responding.  I prairie-dogged my head over the row in front of me and saw the cabin crew a row or two forward.  One had a panel open and was futzing with electronics inside.  A couple others were consulting manuals and chattering about what they were finding in German (it was Lufthansa).  It was very clear to me that something was wrong and they were trying to fix it.

In short order, a short, fat American asshole waddles up and announces, "my tee vee ain't workin'."  A six and a half foot, blonde, Bavarian flight attendant eyed her, wondered how grandpa lost the war to this idiot and said, "Ve are experiencing a technical problem zat will be alleviated shortly, madam.  Please kehren Sie zu ... ah ... please return to your seat."  "But it won't work," said the Amerikaner, "won't turn on."  "Jah, jah, ve fix," said the flight attendant.

I shook my head.  "Look around, shithead," I thought, "the lights are off, nothing works, and the crew is dicking around behind panels.  Your monitor is the least of their problems."

We live in this world.  Little problems are bigger than big problems.

Tonight - The Homestead
(5th Thursday of the month.  That's reason enough to celebrate) 


bye-ee!
whrr ... clik!